the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
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