I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize