can we get nightvision for the apartment?
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
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