I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize