I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
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