so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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