no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
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We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
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Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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