I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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