Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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