I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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