i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
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