Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
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You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
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The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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