Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
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Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
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Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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