I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
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He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
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