These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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