The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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