and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize