i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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