did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
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I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
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I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
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