So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
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