it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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