Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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