I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
is it fun? or sober?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize