belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Randomize