The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize