She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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