If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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