Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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