woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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