I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
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Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
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I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
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