She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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