i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Randomize