Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize