party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize