so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
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I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
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Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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