Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Randomize