I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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