Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize