I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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