I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
BRING THE BAGELS
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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