Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize