I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize