About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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