Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
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I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
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so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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