I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize