Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
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