Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize