you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize