I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize