Texts From Last Night

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  (310): View more from California

  Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.

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  (310): Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me. http://tfl.nu/e0xw
  Replies (57) Good night (3730) Bad night (545) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.

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  (773): I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier. http://tfl.nu/mu3y
  Replies (36) Good night (1166) Bad night (7308) Order T-Shirt
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.

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  (240): she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever. http://tfl.nu/656k
  Replies (27) Good night (5649) Bad night (508) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.

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  (617): after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case. http://tfl.nu/63mj
  Replies (9) Good night (4467) Bad night (932) Order T-Shirt
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink

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  (906): I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink http://tfl.nu/nyxg
  Replies (17) Good night (616) Bad night (4019) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?

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  (203): walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something? http://tfl.nu/j190
  Replies (27) Good night (7727) Bad night (1198)
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  (650): View more from California

  If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance

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  (650): If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance http://tfl.nu/4709
  Replies (6) Good night (1135) Bad night (3702) Order T-Shirt
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.

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  (905): Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home. http://tfl.nu/by9e
  Replies (18) Good night (5048) Bad night (775) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly

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  (443): She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly http://tfl.nu/4li6
  Replies (15) Good night (3686) Bad night (1304) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.

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  (405): Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon. http://tfl.nu/zm69
  Replies (34) Good night (8068) Bad night (812) Order T-Shirt
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  (631): View more from New York

  You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.

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  (631): You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning. http://tfl.nu/qol4
  Replies (5) Good night (3286) Bad night (807) Order T-Shirt
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.

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  (705): I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation. http://tfl.nu/brj2
  Replies (6) Good night (861) Bad night (1711) Order T-Shirt
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.

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  (623): I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard. http://tfl.nu/xo35
  Replies (21) Good night (2422) Bad night (630) Order T-Shirt
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.

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  (907): Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was. http://tfl.nu/9i4y
  Replies (3) Good night (1750) Bad night (435) Order T-Shirt
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  (213): View more from California

  If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out

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  (213): If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out http://tfl.nu/pkwm
  Replies (3) Good night (1152) Bad night (344) Order T-Shirt

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